My name is Erin McCrea. I’m a Momma, a pet Momma, and a writer. I had my first baby at age 35 in May of 2016. Becoming a mom was the scariest thing I’ve ever done, and I have loved every moment of it. I blog at http://erinisawriter.blogspot.ca/, but haven’t done a lot since Anthony arrived. It’s my goal to be a consistent Writing Mom by the time his birthday arrives. I’m shy, caring, weird, bossy, and I try to be happy every day. My baby helps with that.
When we decided to try for a baby, it wasn’t a decision we took lightly. We didn’t know if we were ready. I didn’t know if I would ever be ready. It was the scariest decision we’ve made together. We had a house and a big puppy, and we decided to try for one more adventure.
We were lucky when I became pregnant quickly. Really lucky. We were super excited, but, again, scared.
I’ve always liked the idea of only having one baby. It took me until I was 35 years old to finally decide to try. It would be quite a long wait if I take that long deciding on a second. I’m thinking we will stick with one.
I love my son more than anything. He’s changed my life, and he makes me smile and laugh everyday. He also makes me cry occasionally from stress, fatigue, frustration, or anything really – I cry a lot.
In the third trimester, I decided for sure that one was good. The third trimester was tough. In my case, I had a constant sore back, gestational diabetes, heart burn, and pretty much all of the other third trimester woes. The first and the second trimesters were awesome other than the need to sleep all the time. By the time I was sent in to be induced, I decided I never wanted to have a third trimester again.
The first month of Anthony’s life was full of anxiety and fear. We had quite a few bumps in the road (a story for another time). As many parents go through, it was filled with exhaustion.
By that point, I was still sure I’d only have one. I just wanted to love Anthony.
There are MANY reasons to have more than one baby. How do I know this? People wouldn’t stop telling me.
Anytime I told somebody that we were stopping at one, people told me why I should have more. I know this never goes away. If you don’t have a baby, people tell you to have a baby. You have one, people tell you to have another, you have two, and people still have opinions. It never ends.
It did get to the point where I thought MY opinion should be respected. Instead of arguing about my decision, sometimes people should just smile and agree.
I’m not going to go through the list of reasons people gave me to have more than one baby, but I’ll tell you my absolute favourite. I was getting my checkup from my doctor and another doctor, and she told me to come back when I wanted another. I told them I was good with just one. They both disagreed, and the other doctor said, “But he’ll grow up weird. Only children are weird.”
I’m not an only child, but I’m totally weird. So telling me I’m going to raise a weird child doesn’t really bother me. Having one weirdly unique kid pretty much sounds like the best thing in the world. In other words, she made me feel a lot more confident in my decision. I also know some awesome only children who don’t need to be insulted because they’re the only one.
Just a quick note before I finish, at around the six and seven months of Anthony’s life, I started thinking how maybe I’d like another baby. Then, he got sick, and didn’t sleep. I suddenly remembered the pure exhaustion of having a newborn. After he got better, in his eighth month, he hit the worst sleep regression yet. Once again, I was reminded why I was good with my wonderful only child.
My mind may change a hundred more times (as it did before we decide to try for Anthony), and for all I know, I could end up having another. I doubt it, but I could. It’s a decision my partner and I will make together, and we probably won’t involve the opinion of every person who wants us to have more.
By the way, to the parents with multiples, you’re amazing! Rock Stars!
My child will be fine. He’ll have friends. He’ll be social. He’ll have a great life filled with an insane amount of love. If he had a sibling, he’d have all the same things.
Right now, we’re happy. Happy with our little only child.