Nicole Betker is a mother, wife, rabid Toronto Blue Jays fan and a pop culture junkie. Always having an opinion or something to say, it’s time this journalism grad found a place to share her musings on the acts of “adulting”.
Of course, I was anxious. And yes, I was worried.
In my son’s 22-month life I had never been away from him for longer than a 12-hour work day. Sure, he’d been put to bed without me, sure I’d left before he woke up. But I had never been in a different city than my tiny human, let alone away for nearly a week.
Then I snapped out of it. Well, not the missing part – not giving him a kiss before bed for 6 nights in a row sucked – but the worry.
He was with his dad.
Too often it is suggested that dads are babysitters, that they can’t take complete care of the tiny people they half made. It’s not right, and an unfair assumption, particularly in my life.
For 50% of the year, my chosen profession is beyond demanding. I work numerous days in row for long hours. And my husband takes care of it all. He hasn’t complained, he hasn’t questioned it. He lets me sleep in after long days, brings my son to me at work and ensures my son knows he is loved, cared for and sees me via FaceTime (side note, what the heck did parents do before this technology existed?).
I have to admit – and, yes, this has become a bit of a brag post – but I am lucky.
I am a self-proclaimed workaholic. I love my job. I love my career and I love the people I work with. But I also love my family. The support of my husband helps these two things coexist and thrive.
The traditional society views of only the mother can provide a certain something to a child needs to stop, or that a father can’t truly take care of their child in all aspects needs to be debunked.
My husband isn’t a babysitter, nor is he a lesser parent than I. In fact, somedays I think he is a better one. He’s patient, loving and understanding with our son. They both have a sparkle when they see each other and the father-son bond is strong. But so is the mother-son bond.
In our house, we co-parent together and when one of us isn’t around, the other picks up the slack in every way we can. And because of that, we are the best parents we can be.