Debbie and her family moved to Canada in March 2017 from a small town just outside London, England. Before dipping a tentative toe in writing, Debbie was a Cancer nurse Specialist in London, however, the juggle of childcare, long commutes, family and work commitments with the ever rising costs made this, sadly, an impossible career to continue. Whilst trying to find a creative outlet and new niche in life Debbie learnt to make tea cup candles, buy craft supplies that never got used and discovered the joys of blogging and writing. As mum to 4 boys, a new resident of Saskatoon and a relative newcomer to freelance writing, there is always lots going on, creating a new family home in Canada, trying to make new friends and discovering all the things that Saskatoon has to offer.
Currently my home is something akin to a battle ground.
The wounded, brow beaten and tortured are laying defeated littering the living room floor, whilst the tiny victor proudly holds aloft the prize that this skirmish has all been about…..a small black, somewhat scuffed toy car.
This particular war occurred because the prized black car, (which don’t get me wrong is very nice I’m sure, but doesn’t do anything different to the 100 other toy cars that were in easy reach), was in the clutches of someone else.
How dare they touch the hallowed toy.
It seems safe to say that we have entered (early) the terrible two’s!
I have four boys, they range in age from 19, 9, 7 and the youngest son an heir is 19 months old.
Looking back I am pretty sure my older boys were generally all really easy going and laid back, I don’t overly recall any major meltdowns by them, or me to be fair. No screaming fits in grocery stores, no moody interactions, not even the rigid planking position assumed by a small person when they don’t want to be safely clipped into their car seat or stroller.
Now it could be that I have deleted these images from my memory bank and have glossed over them, but I certainly won’t be forgetting the experience currently with our youngest.
There was the screaming, until the veins in his neck looked like they would explode when we were outside Home Sense the other week, all because I wouldn’t let him walk in the road. Add into that the disgusted looks from two other women that were nearby which really didn’t help my self confidence.
The new discovery that kicking and shouting makes nappy changes WAAAYYYYYY harder for mum and dad.
There has been a development of selective hearing when you ask him to touch something like the television screen with his sticky sausage like fingers.
He has got throwing himself down onto the floor in a tantrum down to a fine art, he learnt quite quickly that he needed to control his head so he didn’t bang it (clearly a fast learner).
And the above responses will occur if his 7 or 9 year old brothers decide to play with a toy that he thinks he should have, as the speech skills aren’t available to voice his distain for their plans he uses the next best thing……shrill ear splitting screams to put his point across.
Oh, and as for sleeping through the night, ha, I wish!
So we are on the bumpy patch of the road of child development right now, the time where you feel pushed to your limits, tired, emotional and sometimes quite alone. But we are keeping calm, setting clear boundaries, consistent responses and mainly hoping this ends soon!
Right now, there is an air of calm and quiet that I am absolutely loving (and hoping that it will last), my son is happily playing with an assortment of tupperware boxes and lids, which has kept him entertained for the last half an hour. He is happy and chatting to himself, I love times like this. The kitchen floor is covered mind you, but when he is finished maybe we can play a tidy up game to put them all back as well….I hope!
So to anyone else thats riding this storm with me, it will get better I promise and know that every parent has experienced it in some way, shape or form.
You will discover who we are when you are with you darling child, who at this point is impersonating a demon caught in a trap.
You will be somewhere in the middle of a grocery store and they are screaming, laying on the floor and turning an interesting shade of purple in the face. w
We will pass by, hold eye contact with you, smile, give you a small nod of understanding and continue on our way.
No judgements made, just the understanding that parenting isn’t always easy.