There is a lot going on in our household lately.
My husbands restaurant just re-opened after a lengthy renovation, I am working to get my new business off the ground, we are close to completing a total basement renovation at my Mothers house, AND we are also getting our condo all ship-shape and ready to sell this week, among other things.
As you guys know my handsome hubby is a Chef, therefore works 10-12hr days, so through no fault of his own, almost all the household “stuff” is left in my hands. Throw in a almost 5yr old and a 6 month old and I’m sure you can feel that I maaaaaaay be feeling a wee-bit overwhelmed… Ok, a LOT effing overwhelmed.
It is in times like these that I feel like the shittiest mother and wife out there. I feel am constantly snapping at my son for just simply being his normal high energy self, then failing twice by parking him in front of the tv or ipad so I can get a solid hour or so of computer work or house work done, in between him whining “it’s not fair!”, or “this is no fun!!” at me. My smallest seems to be pretty content playing on her tummy with her Sophie or other chewy toys for 20-40 min sometimes (which is amazing), but again, I feel like I’m failing because I am not physically engaging with her and focusing on my own stuff (shame on me, insert eye-roll emoji).
(I’m not even going to get into the husband/wife dynamic at times like these because NEITHER of us come out looking like model spouses, like for real.)
And then I do dumb-ass things like get waaaaaay too deep into Instagram “Mom” accounts. Y’know the ones I’m talking about ladies, the ones with the perfect slim Mama’s-standing-against-some-urban-brick wall-with-their-head-turned-to-the-side-and-their-perfect-long-shiny-hair-partially-covering-their-face-with the-colour-coordinated-babies/children-wearing-flower-crowns-whilst-happily-drinking-some-green- smoothy-out-of-a-freaking-mason-jar. UGH!!!! I am so stupid. Step away from the Insta Kathryn, just step away. Coming in a close second in the Instagram, “making you feel bad about yourself department”, for me would be those mom fitness transformation pages….. but that’s another story. Really at the end of the day I know all those Mom accounts with the thousands or even millions of followers don’t have their shit together all the time either, and have all the same struggles I do. Also, believe it or not, I too have my I-look-like-a-perfect-mom-moments at times.
*And btw, no disrespect to those glossy mom or fitness accounts, keep doing you Mama’s*
Anyway, will my stress and anxiety end in the near future? Will I start feeling like I have it together? Will I stop being frustrated with my children? Will my husband and I start being kinder to each other? Do I have a point, or a solution? No, not really. (shrug)
This is just a rough time, with an unusual number of balls in the air. It will pass, and always does. Better times are ahead, this I know. Until then, I vent. 🙂
You will get through it too.